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Re: Online dating

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I think the bunny ranch would be less hassel.
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Re: Online dating

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Message 2 of 25

no none at all. thinking of just going to the bunny ranch and skipping this agravation. but i am not a quitter. lets try it again.

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Re: Online dating

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Message 3 of 25

Wow!  Someone mentioned making dating sites "more responsible"!  

 

Respomsible for *what*?!  Our own foolishness?

 

We all have to be responsible for our actions.  Needy, lonely hearts are an age old problem, and often lead to rebound relationships that may be based in lies.  Now, we just have more opportunity.

 

1.  Assume that everyone is suspect.  Never send money.  Never.  No matter what they say.

2.  Check photos at https://www.tineye.com/  .    This website will compare the photos they give you to other photos on the Web.  Never send money.  Never.  No matter what they say.

3.  Google names and eMail address that you are given.  Never send money.  Never.  No matter what they say.

4.  Talk (chat online) for a long time before you meet in person.  Talk on the phone (use internet calling) for a while . . . like several calls over several weeks.  Many cable companies support this on wifi.  Never send money.  Never.  No matter what they say.

5.  Never send money.  Never.  No matter what they say.  This includes gift cards, online calling cards.

6.  Did I say never send money.  Never.  No matter what they say.

 

Join some local groups, take a class, go to meals at Senior Center, use Meetup.com - it is not a dating site.

 

Please, never send money.  Never.  No matter what they say.

 

Best of luck in searching.

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Re: UPDATE.....: Online dating

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Message 4 of 25
Church
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Re: UPDATE.....: Online dating

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Meetup! Meetup is a site online or an app that allows you to join groups of interest in your local area to meet new people face-to-face. I belong to a dinner group, christain social group and a movie group on Meetup. I found there were too many scammers on the dating sites; people pretending to be who and what they weren't in real life. So many military and people from overseas looking to scam older adulThis way you meet a group of new friends with the same interests in real life situations. Good luck in your search. Happy New Year.

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Re: UPDATE.....: Online dating

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Haven't found a woman who really interest me. Where is the best place to meet women?

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UPDATE.....: Online dating

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Message 7 of 25

HEARTS.gifHow are things going?  Hope you have had luck finding a new love!

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Re: Online dating

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Message 8 of 25

pvdugas makes some excellent points in her post.

 

I agree with her that there is "good" and "bad" everywhere, on the streets, at the grocery market, the big "W" store, etc. and even online.

 

I think no matter where the "date" originated from, at least if both parties are 100% truthful with each other up front, then each side has a decision to make about each other at that point. And you may walk away from your date, but at least you could walk from him/her knowing they were at a least honest with you.

 

And her solid words of "MEET in a public place" is very good advice. I don't seeing being cautious upfront as being paranoid, I see it as a responsible and very smart way of safe guarding ones self until that guard is no longer needed.

 

Take care and be safe!

 

 

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Re: Online dating

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Message 9 of 25

Online dating....now that's a serious discussion waiting to happen. I've been fortunate to meet several really nice men online. Some of them I dated for awhile and nothing really came of it but we remained friends. It actually takes a little practice. Weed out the junk and to do that you have to know what you're looking for. There are so many signs that I watch for early on and the creeps never fail to show you who they are. As Maya Angelou once said:  "When someone shows you who they are the first time, believe them."  I've been offline for a few years now and when I decide to go back online I am always amazed at seeing the same faces, photos and lines.  I went on a date with a guy once and had to abruptly get up from the table and leave because I could tell from his conversation that he only had one thing in mind. Boy bye!  About a year later he showed up on another site and had to nerve to try to talk to me forgetting that we had gone out on a date. I have amnay looks so I think the picture threw him off. I had to block him from contacting me.

I had to explain it to one of my close friends like this:  You can meet a creep at the market in the soda isle. Online dating has this stigma that only desperate people are there. There are bad people everywhere. You will all remember the tragic story of the young mother from Seattle, I believe, who went to a Mariners game with someone she met online and ended up dead, chopped up and placed in someone's trash bin. Facebook was outraged, rightfully so, but there were tons of negative comments about online dating.  Online dating is only a place to meet someone. When I read these stories about people meeting online, emailing, then talking for months at a time I am baffled.  There are countless stories of women who were swindled out of thousand upon thousands of dollars to men they never even met. That's crazy to me. I'm a "show me" don't 'tell me" kinda girl.  You meet online, you then talk and meet IN A PUBLIC PUBLIC PLACE.  The first meeting will tell you where to go from there but like someone else said:  You have to be careful and have boundaries.

That which you attempt to control...controls you - Iyanla Vanzant
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Re: Online dating

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Message 10 of 25

33 years! Man I tell ya that's a long time and you got me beat by 10 years.  23 years with my wife and off to the South she flew. You can find details as to what happened (or at least what I think happened) if you would like to benchmark and compare.

 

So we seem to have shared the same fate, no matter how each of us got here to this point.  Sure does get hard sometimes being alone, I get it all to well. I have ran into a few offers here and there from women, but I choose to remain in solitude until my wound heals.

 

I suggest the first thing to do is to pick yourself up off the ground and stand up.  Keep walking and keep breathing.  My advice is to reflect by yourself  as to what happened and try to take all of the negative thoughts and convert them to positive thoughts, I know what your thinking, easier said then done.  Read my posts, read other peoples posts, read all you can about losing someone you loved or/and your marriage.  It does help to know that the are many others going through the same things we are. Just throwing my 2 cents out there in case you might need it.

 

I suggest you get yourself back out into the world and not focus on the online dating scene. Don't have any expectations and start looking at people.  Don't worry about rejection, you might get rejected 100 times, who cares! Someday, somewhere eventually someone will say "yes" to you, it's just a question of when and who.

 

So put on those walking shoes, take your first step with your head held up, and keep looking to see what and who comes your way.

 

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