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Apologies for the duplicate posts. A carriage return must equal a "submit" which obviously wasn't my intent.
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This is an interesting thread.  From my perspective (married once for 20 years, two kids, divorced, spent 20 years or so getting my head together, met a very kind and sweet man after many years of single life. We clicked, married pretty quickly, had a very interesting five or so years, then he died. Although I say we clicked, we were so different in most things yet so similar in the fundamental things that matter most. In those short years, I let him crack my psychic and social walls -- we joked that he crashed into my life like Yosemite Sam crashes through a roof.  I think after a few years in my first relationship, I came to feel as you do -- I had a pretty solid wall that allowed a safe emotional flatline and practicality to make life choices.  My second husband was not that type of personality. Some of his choices didn't work out as he hoped, some didn't work at all, some were stellar.  For him, life was a smorgasbord - he triesome things didn'tdishes weren't tasty but the experiences were worth it.  That showed me I could go 'half a bubble off plumb' when it felt right to me even if it might be a little unconventional to others. 

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