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Re: AARP DATING SITE

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Message 111 of 122
@bf289 wrote:

 Hi.   I see you posted quite some time ago.  This is the first time on this site or anything to do with dating sites, although I've been a member for 20 years.  I've been single since the end of March.  Been married my entire life!  The lonliness is overwhelming. 


I don't know the circumstances for you being single again, but it's probably wise to ease back into the social scene via safe groups & with friends you already know. Probably the most dangerous time to start dating, especially via the online, is when a person is desperate because "the loneliness is overwhelming"! That often means people ignore the red flags they see, and leap to conclusions about what the smallest kindness might mean. Be Careful!!


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Re: AARP DATING SITE

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Message 112 of 122

Yes, there are scammers everywher and seniors are certainly a target.  Good for you for playing it smart.

 

Remeber though, there are still some gems out there.


"FAKE 45 #illegitimate" read a sign at the Woman's March in DC, 1/27/2017
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Re: AARP DATING SITE

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Message 113 of 122

 Hi.   I see you posted quite some time ago.  This is the first time on this site or anything to do with dating sites, although I've been a member for 20 years.  I've been single since the end of March.  Been married my entire life!  The lonliness is overwhelming.  I've tried eharmony, Match2.com, and christianmingle.com.  I was on christianmingle.com when a person such as you described.  He was slow going, talked a lot, was an expert typist, and told me everything I ever wanted to hear.  After about 30 days of daily messaging, some phone calling (he was French and had that French accent so was difficult to understand over the phone).  Anyway, he finally got around to explaining how this job he was on required an additional expenditure and he really needed to finish it so he could then leave and come see me.  HA!  He asked for $4500.  My goodness.....lol.   I began putting 2 and 2 together, I saved all our communications and saw where the discrepancies in what he told me over the weeks didn't add up.  I wouldn't have sent money anyway, cause I'm a bit smarter than that (like you).  I wrote a dear John letter to him then blocked him from my site and my phone.  Wow.   These kinds of men are everywhere.

 

The dating sites can only go by what people tell them on their application.  It is us who have to be careful.  Even on this site.  What makes me really angry is even though my profile says I want to meet people within 50 miles of my zip code, they forward on people from around the country and world!  Geez!  A person over 50 wants to have a conversation with a local man, someone they can meet for coffee or dinner,  date perhaps, etc.  How on earth can someone have a long distance relationship such as around the country/world.   Makes me very angry.  I will get an email about how someone is interested me and I excitedly go see only to find it's a 28 year old in Nigeria or somewhere. 

 

Anyway, this is long, but I wanted to wish you well....I hope you find what you're looking for, and it's hard.  May God bless you and yours......Bonnie

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Re: AARP DATING SITE - "not really AARP" dating site

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Message 114 of 122

Well said,  Yanch22  ! 

 

You are absolutely correct.   Unfortunately,  it will roll right off and fail to sink in to many here.    

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Re: AARP DATING SITE - "not really AARP" dating site

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Message 115 of 122

You're slicing and dicing.  Google "AARP Dating site" - it takes you to AARP.  Receive a message from someone on the date site - it's titled "AARP Dating" in your inbox - you log in to AARP.  Join and you get billed by "AARP."  News articles by NPR, NY Times - "AARP Dating site."  I don't care who is 'pushing the buttons' or 'flipping the switches' behind the scenes - AARP does the advertising, takes the monthly fees, and has their brand/logo associated with each and every item related to this dating site.  AARP should be responsive and monitoring who they link their name and millions of members to...no different than me monitoring who my son is 'dating' -  no pun intended.

I would not hesitate to say that thousands of AARP members who are not computer savvy and do not understand the 'back door' relationship also assume all is controlled by AARP - which it is.  AARP signed the contract, agreed to the terms, and money exchanges hands; seems like they need to re-visit the relationship due to the relationship issues arising....

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Re: AARP DATING SITE

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Message 116 of 122


 

am,

 

There are jerks everywhere, even on dating sites....you just need to weed through them, just as you do in your garden.  If you're a rose, you'll find a rose...

 

There are dating sites just for seniors that you might find more appropriate and many say eharmony is a good site as well.

 

One comment you made here though is, IMO, a red flag to many men...."I am ready for a relationship now..."  Though it very well be innocent enough, some may see it as desperate or needy.  Take your time....and weed first.  You may be pleasantly surprised to find that beautiful flower you knew was out there.

 

Good luck.


"FAKE 45 #illegitimate" read a sign at the Woman's March in DC, 1/27/2017
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Re: AARP DATING SITE

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Message 117 of 122
@Yanchc22 wrote:

I agree 100% with someone in the dating site responding under someone's profile/picture.  Noticed it recently when I started receiving replies not matching the profiles.  Getting notes from "engineers" who can't spell or speak proper English.  If that's what they got from their degrees/years in school, this is sad or more likely an impostor!  I plan to play along and yank their cords...sad that AARP does not have more interest in cleaning these guys out and having a more secure site.  Wasted money for something serious so I might as well have some fun for what I paid for!  I can build a story as big as the next guy!  Good luck.  Be glad you're smart enough to spot such weirdos...


WHAT dating website are you referring to? AARP partners with some other company they recommend, but have no control over that other website. There is no "dating website" on the AARP website.


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Re: AARP DATING SITE

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Message 118 of 122

I agree 100% with someone in the dating site responding under someone's profile/picture.  Noticed it recently when I started receiving replies not matching the profiles.  Getting notes from "engineers" who can't spell or speak proper English.  If that's what they got from their degrees/years in school, this is sad or more likely an impostor!  I plan to play along and yank their cords...sad that AARP does not have more interest in cleaning these guys out and having a more secure site.  Wasted money for something serious so I might as well have some fun for what I paid for!  I can build a story as big as the next guy!  Good luck.  Be glad you're smart enough to spot such weirdos...

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Re: AARP DATING SITE

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Message 119 of 122
Just wanted to add that over the years I have had a photo of the "family jewels" sent to me. That joker should have borrowed a photo from someone. I have had old guys tell me about their pump, just like they think it is an asset. This is before I had finished my cup of coffee. I have never seen a pump and don't want to see one. That is the same as if I wore depends and told him about them. I have had them tell me the love of their life just died. I have always wondered if her funeral was over when he started looking. Nope, don't think the dating sites are for me.

Soosie
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Re: AARP DATING SITE

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Message 120 of 122
This is just my opinion, but I have NEVER found a dating site that is not filled with the wrong type of men. I am not a member of the one you speak of, but I am sure it is no different. I did meet one nice man a long time ago, but that is the only one. He moved from the area and I am sure he found a nice partner for the rest of his life. I have had men tell me to wise up that these sites are only for sex. The last one I met came on like gangbusters and the date lasted less than 20 minutes. I think I broke some kind of record. When we got in his car he started to tell me if we were going to have a relationship, I would need to stay in touch with him regularly. I told him that is a deal breaker, I don't stay on the phone with someone. I asked him to turn around and take me back home. I don't need a insecure man in my life.

I have a male friend who lost his wife. He jumped back into the dating scene on Match and met someone. I think they lived together until a suitable time passed and then married. Recently he told me she is a con artist, contributes nothing and is selling off much of what he owns. I suggested a lawyer to him. He did tell me his home has been put into his daughter's name. I know it is a touchy subject since she is his wife, but I also suggested that he talk to his daughter and tell her the whole story. I don't think men like to think they have been taken. Perhaps his daughter could have him stay with her for awhile and give the old broad 10 days to get out of the house. She could say it was being sold. My friend said he was afraid of being alone. I told him it is much better to be alone than with someone you cannot trust.

I really veered off with this, but the bottom line is no one could pay me to be on one of those sites.

Soosie
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