AARP Online Community and Discussion Forums - Re: Love Limericks

Rhymesometimes · ‎10-13-2021

Began writing them in May 2021, and never stopped. If you enjoy reading and/or writing them, here's a forum for you. I'll pop in periodically to add mine. Would love to see people contribute.

My husband comes running upset.

By something he read, I can bet.

Seems his shirts are passe,

Toss Hawaiians away.

Or wear at the beach with Annette. *

*Annette Funicello & Frankie Avalon, those crazy kids.

"Sweet" Aunt Myrtle again with re-gift.

A large turtle, this time, I'm so miffed.

It's not running away.

How far could it stray?

Was bamboozled, just face it, got stiffed.

I feel an immense agitation,

In generalized terms, complication.

It's a dare from a guy,

I'd wing walk, he'd fly.

My fear, premature debarkation.

Rhymesometimes · ‎11-15-2021

@ciptra38 @postman29 @AvocadoDog After four months of entering a specific limerick contest every two weeks online, I got my first honorable mention! Whoo hoo! Here it is:

To get an appointment, it's weeks?

My body has creaks, and it squeaks.

The complaint that's the worst,

I should have said first.

That e-ver-y orifice leaks.

Here's a few more:

"The plumbers went haywire", she shrieks,

"From worsening damaging leaks.

Most disturbing of cracks.

Had slid from their slacks.

Which were four of their frightening cheeks."

Their factory barely afloat.

Executives trimming the bloat.

Then the helium leak,

And explosion last week.

The workers went out on high note.

That's all for now.

Rhymesometimes · ‎11-01-2021

Here are three more:

In the average appointment with Doc,

She is constantly checking the clock.

Her schedule is strained.

I'm feeing so drained.

Like my account at the bank, what a crock.

Seems David's unusual doc.

It's the movie-like Mafia talk.

And what's written on slips,

as he hands out his 'scripts.

"Just take the cannoli and walk."

( The Godfather reference )

She's Hollywood's favorite doc.

All the stars use her office, they flock.

With snipping and sucking,

the fat that is fluxing.

There's no ageing, regardless of clock.

More to come next week. Keep writing, Rhymes

postman29 · ‎11-01-2021

@Rhymesometimes

Awesome! Especially that first one! Thanks for the laugh. Very relatable!

Rhymesometimes · ‎11-01-2021

Steve the @postman29 , Thank you!

Rhymesometimes · ‎11-08-2021

Three more limericks:

Those Barrel of Monkeys no charm.

For people could trip and cause harm.

They're scattered on chairs,

And ascending the stairs.

Arm and in Arm and in Arm.

She thought, "He's a dapper old bloke.

So smart, and oh boy can he joke.

The Bach and this doc,

With moonlight to walk.

Just hope that this Brit's not baroque."

Had referral, installing of planks.

But discovered through hammering clanks.

With your teeth, he's your doc.

Has braces in stock.

And everything lined up, so thanks

postman29 · ‎10-30-2021

I remember my days pre-teen,

the darkness, the creatures, I'd seen,

But the thing that was dandy,

was my bag filled with candy,

that made me just love Halloween.

Happy Halloween!

Rhymesometimes · ‎10-30-2021

Steve the @postman29 , That's awesome! Thank you for sending that. Happy Halloween!

Well good new, bad news. I didn't win latest limerick contest. ( But posting some from the past two weeks.) But my husband and I were on the winning team for the AARP Trivia Game this past Thursday. Pretty fun. We may become regular trivia gamers.

Happy Halloween to you and your family!

ciptra38 · ‎10-26-2021

You're so good at this - they're awesome & hilarious! I'm coming straight here from now on - games can wait til after lol!

Rhymesometimes · ‎10-27-2021

@ciptra38 , Thank you for your kind words. Just started writing them in May, so still lots for me to learn.

ciptra38 · ‎10-30-2021

- my next one, lol (with embarrassment) :

I once met a girl named Savanna

Who always had on a bandanna.

What shocked me the most

Was her mailbox post,

Displaying the surname Banana!

Rhymesometimes · ‎10-30-2021

@ciptra38 Love it!. Two small tweaks. You're great at this.

I once met a girl named Savanna

Who always would wear a bandana.

What shocked me the most

Was her mailbox on post

Displaying the surname Banana

ciptra38 · ‎10-30-2021

Asking my Dad as a boy,

Why some people like to destroy.

He said, "Tough to know

Why is this woe.

But best way to help is spread joy."

I'm a girl, but this really happened, and my wonderful father really said this, which stays with me all these decades later😍

Rhymesometimes · ‎10-30-2021

@ciptra38 Smart man your dad.

Asking my Dad as a boy.

Explain why some people destroy.

He said, "Tricky to know,

What's bringing this woe.

So shift it by spreading your joy.

ciptra38 · ‎11-03-2021

Yes he was - wonderful, kind, and smart! Thank you!

ciptra38 · ‎11-03-2021

Gotcha Rhyme - Sorry you have to keep correcting me lol!

Rhymesometimes · ‎11-04-2021

@ciptra38 Remember, I'm no expert, having just started a few months ago myself. I'm still making my own errors as I navigate limerick writing. You are doing great, your creativity and ideas are fantastic!

ciptra38 · ‎11-03-2021

In school, I learned that a 'strop'

Sharpens razors in a barber shop.

I found that so weird,

'Cause to me it was clear

It's a strap made to hold up one's top.

😅don't know where these are coming from, but I'm going with it lol😅! line 2 is wrong - still working on correction...

Rhymesometimes · ‎11-04-2021

@ciptra38 A few tweaks, and you've got a winner!

The barbers, I learned use a "strop."

It sharpens the razors in shop.

I found that so weird,

To me it was clear.

It's a strap made to hold up one's top.

Line 2 was a little tricky! The words sharpens, razors, barber and shop are all definite stressed syllables. And there are 4 of them. We can only use 3 in that line. So I moved barber to line 1 and eliminated school.

If that had not been necessary, all that needed to be done in line 1 was to add "had" to satisfy the rhythm .

In school, I had learned that a "strop."

Just to let you know, if you put my name @Rhymesometimes in your posts, I will automatically get an email sent to me that you have posted. Rhymes

ciptra38 · ‎11-04-2021

Awesome Rhyme! I couldn't come up with a fitting phrase for line 2. You did, though, & thanks❣️ That's so nice of you to let me do that (put your name in my posts so you can see them). Please look for 10+ daily😁 --- just kidding lol! -will try more tomorrow. -love that you started this! I learned I have limericks lurking in the 'ol noggin😄 ♥️

Rhymesometimes · ‎10-23-2021

Another three to share:

Congested with headache, in pain,

Lifting a Kleenex a strain.

My husband's loud snoring,

That's shaking the flooring.

Is driving me quickly insane.

She say, "Hon, need more packet of yeast."

He says, "Stop you're a beast, slow at least.

This baking of bread.

My health, look ahead."

Too late, his poor heart, it has ceased.

( Sequel )

I am Blyth, was the wife, of dear Fred.

He's gone from the baking of bread.

Will slim down my waist,

Don't want to be placed.

To quickly with Fred, and be dead.

I think these three were a bit sad due to both my husband and I having COVID at the time.

postman29 · ‎10-23-2021

@Rhymesometimes

😀This is for the new limericks, 😥 this is for the Covid. 😌and this is for you and your husband's recovery! Be well!

Rhymesometimes · ‎10-24-2021

Steve the @postman29

You brought a smile to my lips,

Your post and emojis eclipse.

The COVID of gloom,

That I and my groom.

are finally removed of its grips.

ciptra38 · ‎10-15-2021

(This one prob needs correcting also, Rhyme; it was off the top of my head. First 2 lines are 8 syllables, but don't flow; emphasis falls on the wrong syllables; also, it's not love related -posting it anyway lol!)

- went shopping, bought a fancy gown

to wear to a gala downtown

Got eyed with disdain

by a snob with champagne

who asked how I dared to dress down.