Take control of your brain health with Staying Sharp! Try it today.

Reply
Highlighted
Silver Conversationalist
0
Kudos
3206
Views

Re: Same old story?

3,206 Views
Message 1 of 12

Not to jump, but I will.   How you doing?   You still holding on?    35 years is a great accomplishment and it is amazing to see a marriage have a long history such as yours.

 

Hope begins in the heart and that is a great start. I believe you will find all that you seek.

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
3206
Views
Info Seeker
0
Kudos
3405
Views

Re: Same old story?

3,405 Views
Message 2 of 12

Morningstar09

u just gave me the hope I needed. 35 years of marriage, trying to hold on. Some days just feel like walking out the door. Praying more. Reading my word and seeking hope. 

Thanks

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
3405
Views
Info Seeker
0
Kudos
3908
Views

Re: Same old story?

3,908 Views
Message 3 of 12

Late Life Divorce  My first marriage lasted 17 years, my second marriage lasted 23 years. What was the cause of these Two divorces? Another woman was waiting on the other side. They stick around no gripes, complaints tell you how wonderful you are  strong a Good Wife Lucky to have you on and on.

Continued: I would say the last 5 years of 2nd marriage hit rock bottom.  This man would pick on me and yes fight and argue verbal abuse, accuse, put down  find every reason to Leave me. so he could contine on his journey with other woman., because there just wasn't any.how can he leave a woman who is really good to him.he had to fine a reason to leave.. He put me through Hell.  Well I wasn't going to burn for long .. I looked at him,turned around walked out the door and never looked back.

ANTONETTE LOUISE KEMPLEN
Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
3908
Views
Social Butterfly
2
Kudos
6501
Views

Re: Same old story?

6,501 Views
Message 4 of 12

This happened to my husband and I years ago and I met the woman no fights , bad words or nothing like that , I was dressed to kill of course but didn't say nothing to her , but in my situation we moved away and I turned to God because I couldn't deal with it and I finally told my husband if you want to go , then there is the door but I am Not going to live this way something has got to change and it did not right away but in trusting God and getting closer to God , things started to get better for us and here we are still married. It took me awhile and we did talk about it through heart aches and tears we finally came out of that life to the better. My husband had a heart attack and I took care of him , he thanked me , could have never done that without God in my life. He is better now and even went back to work. Find your purpose in life what God has for you. Put God first before anything. Have a good day and hope everything works out .....

Mary
Report Inappropriate Content
2
Kudos
6501
Views
Conversationalist
0
Kudos
7235
Views

Re: Same old story?

7,235 Views
Message 5 of 12

You make a point that many others have not in similar posts.  Your relationship with your husband was strained, though he was a good guy.  And I presume you were pretty good, too.  So many "divorce posts" refer to abusive relationships.  It sounds like your marriage is like mine.  We are strained.  We are stressed.  But there's no abuse, no weird stuff, no screaming matches, no hate.  Just strain.  I can't say it prompted me to go out and look for an alternative, though I admit to being open to one.  And the green grass on that other side was welcoming.  It still is.  And part of me thinks it really is greener.  But we're in counseling and we'll see what happens.  I still miss the woman I was having my emotional affair with, thoiugh I don't know what she's feeling, and I think it's kind of sad that I don't.  So, we'll see.  Thanks for your comment.

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
7235
Views
Frequent Social Butterfly
2
Kudos
7249
Views

Re: Same old story?

7,249 Views
Message 6 of 12

It is not my way to judge people,  unless I have walked a mile in thier shoes.

 

I do know my husband and I had a strained relationship for a long time,  never went for counseling, just tried to live this way...He has passed away now,  so is too late for me.  Looking back I know I could have done things differently as he could have too.  He was really a good guy, and would do anything for me.  

 

Just remember, sometimes things seem better on the other side of the fence.  And they really aren't.

Report Inappropriate Content
2
Kudos
7249
Views
Conversationalist
0
Kudos
7481
Views

Re: Same old story?

7,481 Views
Message 7 of 12

I think you meant to say that you wouldn't be courteous (I imagine you might have used more colorful language).  And I wouldn't blame you.  Or my wife.  Her response has shocked me, though my therapist says that her response is understandable given her (my wife's) view of our relationship and her own self-confidence, inner strength, etc.  I'm sure it can't be easy, though we don't really talk about it.  Her choice, I think.  We'll see what comes out in marital counseling. 

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
7481
Views
Conversationalist
0
Kudos
7484
Views

Re: Same old story?

7,484 Views
Message 8 of 12

I'm not sure I would say this to my wife, but, yes, it was worth it.  Regardless of whether my be courteous

 

Do I want to end the marriage?  What do I expect or hope be courteous

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
7484
Views
Valued Social Butterfly
0
Kudos
7487
Views

Re: Same old story?

7,487 Views
Message 9 of 12

I don't understand why AARP is changing my post.  "Courteous" is NOT what I would be doing if I was your wife.

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
7487
Views
Valued Social Butterfly
0
Kudos
7497
Views

Re: Same old story?

7,497 Views
Message 10 of 12

If I was your wife I would be be courteous

Report Inappropriate Content
0
Kudos
7497
Views