I'm getting ready to send a birthday card to my best friend of over 60 years. I hope she remembers who I am. She is confused these days and has memory problems.
Our years together went so fast. We were 16, then we were 20, then 40. When we reached 60, we marveled at the length and depth of our friendship. We laughed and said, "Maybe we'll be two little old ladies sitting together in a nursing home someday." We were ok with that. We'd still be "us", only older. We'd still have our friendship and our laughter to get us through the hardships of our later years.
Only it didn't turn out that way. We are 80 now. I'm still "me," but she isn't "her" anymore. She has been in a memory care facility for the past year.
I can't visit, so I send her cards. (Birthday, Christmas, Thinking of You.) Anything to stay in touch. The card I bought for her today is the prettiest card I could find, and it sparkles. She always appreciated beauty, and she loves "pizzazz."
I will sign the card by saying that I hope she is well, that I love her, miss her, and think of her often.
I hope she likes the card, reads my words, and remembers something. I think she will remember my name, and maybe even some of the good times we had. But she will quickly forget, and her demons will return. (Where am I? Why can't I go home?)
Her situation pains me. I wish I could make her well, or turn back the clock to happier times for her, but I can't do that.
All I can do is deal with today. I do what I can to hopefully make her life a little happier, and I do my best to be grateful for all the wonderful years that we had.
What an incredibly thoughtful gift...the gift of you! Just the fact that you could trigger a pleasant memory or bring a smile to her face will be absolutely priceless. Better than any gift you could possibly give, especially under the circumstances. Blessings to you!
What a wonderful friend you are! I am sure every card and every note matters to her. Maybe not in ways we are accustomed to seeing, and maybe not with the reactions we are used to getting, but it matters.