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πŸ€— The 7 grief stages and how they help the grieving process | HCF

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Loss affects us all and is one of the most traumatic life events. Here’s how understanding the 7 stages of grief can help you with the grieving process.

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(7) Processing grief. There is no right or wrong way to grieve – the process is highly individual. In addition, there’s no quick fix; the healing process takes time and varies from person to person. Importantly, there is no β€œnormal” timeframe, so be patient with yourself.

 

Wendy also suggests the following coping strategies that you may find helpful.

 

(a) Express your grief in words or another creative outlet, such as painting or drawing.

 

(b) Connect with others – this can be loved ones or community support groups.

 

(c) Ask for help, in whatever form.

 

(d) Practise deep breathing regularly.

 

(e) Set small, realistic goals.

Ensure you’re getting enough sleep and aim for some form of movement each day.

 

(f) Eat a healthy, balanced diet and keep hydrated.

 

(g) Rehearse how you respond to questions and new situations.

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(6) Acceptance and hope. Humans, by nature, crave contact, connection and support, and at some stage in the grieving process will want to engage with friends and family again. Acceptance is about realising you can’t change the circumstances, but that you can gain some control over how you respond.

 

β€œAt times, we may need to distract ourselves from the grief, or place it to one side, so we can get on with work or social situations,” says Nathan.

 

But this is also a stage where you might slip backwards and find yourself feeling overwhelmed from all the emotions again. It’s normal to move between any of the stages of grief from hour to hour, or even minute to minute.

 

Says Sherene: β€œI gave myself permission to grieve. I felt that patience was a gift to myself.

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(5) Depression. The jumble of emotions that usually accompanies the grieving process can typically lead to feelings of depression, isolation, anxiety and a feeling of dread. Sometimes the suffering seems too much to bear. β€œSomeone may question the meaning of life, or feel they want to be reunited with the person that’s died,” says Nathan. In cases like this, it’s so important to ask for help.

 

β€œPeople are often unsure of how to help us in our grief, so if you can accept an offer of help or ask for help, it will have the effect of strengthening those friendships,” he adds.

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(4) Bargaining. The bargaining stage is about making promises to yourself or a higher being, asking the universe for a chance to put things right. A bereaved person may seek reason where there is none, and may feel guilty about how they behaved, or feel in some way to blame.

 

β€œThere’s a sense that, β€˜Maybe I could have done things differently’,” says Nathan. β€œIf only I’d stopped them leaving the house or I knew more about their medical condition, I could’ve intervened. We may feel helpless and hopeless, and consumed by thoughts of, β€˜What if?

 


@APassionateLife wrote:

πŸ‘‰Any comments? πŸ€”

 

Loss affects us all and is one of the most traumatic life events. Here’s how understanding the 7 stages of grief can help you with the grieving process.

πŸ‘‰

LINK TO ONLINE ARTICLE 

 

➑️To reply to this post, click on REPLY BUTTON at bottom of this post, enter your text, then click REPLY BUTTON again.⬅️


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(3) Anger. It’s perfectly normal to feel anger in times of loss, but often people try to keep this stage of grief hidden.

 

β€œAnger is a difficult emotion to deal with and can be minimised by others,” says Nathan. β€œBut it’s important to find someone with whom we can connect in an honest way.”

 

β€œI felt frustrated that my experience of grief was different to that of those I was close to,” says Sherene. β€œI was angry with myself – that I was taking too long, and wanting to talk about Mum and Dad to people who felt I should’ve moved on.

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(2) Denial. Many people experience denial after a bereavement: they know something has happened but it doesn’t feel real.

 

β€œFor me, the denial was not that I didn’t believe it – it was more a sense of, β€˜But how can they not be here? How can they have been here, and now they aren’t?’” says Sherene.

 

In addition to experiences of shock and denial, people often describe having a β€˜mental fog’, says Nathan. β€œThis can include forgetfulness, lack of concentration, sleeplessness, lack of motivation, repetitive thoughts and inability to make a decision."

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(1) Shock. Feelings of shock are unavoidable in nearly every situation, even if we feel we have had time to prepare for the loss of a loved one. We know it’s going to happen, but not right then, not on that day. People in shock often appear to be behaving normally without a lot of emotion, because the news hasn’t fully sunk in yet.

 

β€œOften there is a sense of numbness and a self-protective detachment from your feelings, because they are too intense to deal with,” says Nathan.

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