I'll tell you one thing, noone can say you didn't give it a hearty try. Four times married. Brrrrr!!! Sends a chill up my spine. But I'm glad to know you are okay by yourself. At least I hope you have peace now....and happiness.
Seriously, do whatever the heck you want. You answer to no one but yourself.
Feel like taking an impromptu trip to Spain? Book it. Want to binge-watch the new season of "Orange is the New Black?" Clear your schedule, and hit the couch. You run the show.
You're not bound morally or contractually to check in, refer to or run anything past anyone in your personal life. You can work long hours if you wish, start your own business (or multiple businesses) and forge your own destiny.
Being single comes with the unrivaled freedom that a number of people in relationships do not have. It's all about you, and that's a beautiful thing.
I have to laugh at the prospect of being totally carefree, now that I've got 3 cats in the house! I didn't intend to get any pets, but these 3 feral siblings moved onto my property about a year ago. With the help of a rescue group, they were all neutered & had an ear clipped, so people would know that. When it got cold, it was easier to just get them used to being in my house, then to get them to use an insulated shelter outside! Because they are feral & spend lots of time outside, it would be difficult to have someone feed them, if I went away on vacation, unless the person "house sat" as well. They never lose their wildness totally, but I woke up about 3 AM today, with 2 of them sleeping on the bed with me!
I often wonder what my life would have been if I had not listened to everybody after my second divorce. I was so enjoying being on my own again after a disasterous four months marriage following a four year relationship. I seemed to be a worry to everyone because I was living alone and enjoying it.
I don't really regret marriages #3 and #4 as there were some good things about both. The third brought me to where I now live and #4 finally taught me that I really like being alone and I'm much better at that than being a part of a relationship.