Gaslighting by your kids?

[anddee]

I am a healthy senior, independent and capable, with generally good human and canine relationships. I am of sound of body and mind as far as anyone can tell, yet I have an adult child who is in a perpetual state of "gaslighting" me. "You're losing it!" "That's not what happened, what I said", in addition to the general toxicity, being rude, dismissive, and derogatory. 

Has anyone else had to deal with this and if so what has been effective? I'd love a healthy discussion of what works and more importantly, tools and techniques that help remedy the situation if possible. 

Thanks!  

[PattyDiane]

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@anddee wrote:

I am a healthy senior, independent and capable, with generally good human and canine relationships. I am of sound of body and mind as far as anyone can tell, yet I have an adult child who is in a perpetual state of "gaslighting" me. "You're losing it!" "That's not what happened, what I said", in addition to the general toxicity, being rude, dismissive, and derogatory. 

Has anyone else had to deal with this and if so what has been effective? I'd love a healthy discussion of what works and more importantly, tools and techniques that help remedy the situation if possible. 

Thanks!  

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I just happened to see your post and not certain how much advice I can give.  However, there was a time when I was dealing with some gaslighting issues and I know that if the other person does it well and enough, it can really start to make you feel like you are losing it.  Mine was with a husband and I solved the problem with a good therapist and a divorce.  I realize it's not as easy to divorce a child.  I don't know your situation, but in my case there were some under-lying issues that needed some attention in addition to the episodes of gas-lighting.  I hope you find a solution to your problem and are able to start the new year in a better place.

[retiredtraveler]

"......I am a healthy senior, independent and capable, with generally good human and canine relationships. I am of sound of body and mind as far as anyone can tell....".

DW and I are childless. Can't help with the 'gaslighting'. Just happy you have good 'canine relationships'. They are infinitely easier than humans.

I would tell you to tell the kid that dogs are better than him/her, but that would prompt another round of 'you're losing it'...............

[dawsimon]

Oh, I feel your pain!!! I feel like I need to start recording every conversation so I have proof of what I am saying.