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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 11 of 25

Sometimes being a loner can give me peace from daily distractions, yet I'm not into yoga or meditation per se.  Being alone if forced upon you by death or divorce leads to seeking out others of similar circumstances, because it's human nature.  What motivates me to get out and socialize is boredom from a routine.  I'm finding a renewed interest in things I compromised on with my spouse because he didn't share the things I loved to do.  

 

I'm not a party animal either--but if some of you are, a new senior community proposed by Jimmy Buffett called Margheritaville is being built.  Probably a island  setting with Palm trees, tequila, etc --It's 5:00 somewhere.

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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 12 of 25


  One of the big things that the 55  communities push is socialization..  I left thinking that I did not really want to be part of a group that got together every day.  I would not mind once in a while but I wondered how accepting people would be of that kind of attitude where you did not want to be part of the group every day.  

@nyadrn

 

Ewwwww! Eve-r-y Day? No can do. We plan to move into one of these retirement communities shortly before we become too feeble to drive a car. I don't know: maybe we'll be up for everyday contact by then. Maybe we'll lead the daily walk or something then retreat to our apartment. Or maybe we'll resort to starting food fights in the dining hall so they make us eat alone, too ... jk. 

 

I am of the opinion that their attitude about our lifestyle doesn't matter. As paying residents we'd be the boss, not the front office or the activity chair. 

 

"The key to success is to keep growing in all areas of life - mental, emotional, spiritual, as well as physical." Julius Erving
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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 13 of 25

@Soosie wrote:

I like having friends, but find that I have more aquaintances rather than friends, especially in my current state of S. C.  Most of the women have been married forever and are always taking care of grandchildren.  Since I don't fit this category, I have learned to really enjoy my own company.  Sometimes I think I may have gone too far.  >>

 

 

Soosie


I can relate to this.  I have no problem living alone.  I like doing things with family and friends but usually at their homes or out somewhere and I am sure that is because then I can control how long I stay.   One of the big things that the 55  communities push is socialization..  I left thinking that I did not really want to be part of a group that got together every day.  I would not mind once in a while but I wondered how accepting people would be of that kind of attitude where you did not want to be part of the group every day.  

Life's a Journey, not a Destination" Aerosmith
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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 14 of 25

@ASTRAEA Smiley Happy Ye old conundrum of the theoretical versus the actual. 

"The key to success is to keep growing in all areas of life - mental, emotional, spiritual, as well as physical." Julius Erving
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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 15 of 25

@Epster - Funny t-shirt!

 

Kind of reminds me of the Charles Schulz' quote, "I love mankind, it's people I can't stand."


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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 16 of 25

introverts.jpg

 

This shirt reminds me of a t-shirt I had back when I was 15 and living alone in a trailer with just one of the 'modern' conveniences: running water. The trailer was located near a river at the end of a winding mountain road on an Indian reservation. The closest village was a mile away and sported a dozen homes, most of which were occupied sporadically. (translation: boy did I have solitude going for me!)

 

The shirt in question had the word "Go" printed on the front and back. I embroidered the word "Away" underneath those. At 15, I found that hilarious, however the missionaries, when they came knocking, scolded me for being rude. What rude, I wondered. Just direct and honest. LOL. 

 

 

"The key to success is to keep growing in all areas of life - mental, emotional, spiritual, as well as physical." Julius Erving
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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 17 of 25

@Soosie - Sorry I missed this post when it first came out! I've been on my own since 1981, except for 2-1/2 years when my elderly aunt moved in with me. I had to bite my tongue when family & friends would say, "Isn't it nice, having company in the house?" I was a caregiver, even when my aunt did most things for herself, and I didn't feel lonesome before or after she was there!

 

I have a friend who's an extreme extrovert, and thinks that everyone should be or must want to be like her. I read up on extroverts & introverts, and although I can be outgoing & social, I'm just as happy being alone. I find it draining to be out & about at large social events, more than once or twice a week!

 

Tangentially, I don't like when tradesmen charge by the hour, because it motivates them to slow down, often times wanting to "chat" with me. When I had a handyman in for a bunch of smaller jobs, right after I bought this house, I too couldn't wait for him to finish & leave, by 4 or 5 PM!! Smiley Happy


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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 18 of 25

@m933902a wrote:

I enjoy being a loner for the most part but I don't want to grow old alone. Does that make sense?


@m933902a  Indeed, this does make sense.

 

This is one of the reasons we plan to move into a retirement community when we are 85ish (whenever it is that we decide living on the road in our RV isn't fun or safe anymore). We are both the youngest in our families and we do not have children, so by that time we might not have have any family left. So we plan to become the table tennis and/or shuffleboard champs of the XYZ community. Ha ha. 

 

 

"The key to success is to keep growing in all areas of life - mental, emotional, spiritual, as well as physical." Julius Erving
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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 19 of 25

m933902a wrote:

I enjoy being a loner for the most part but I don't want to grow old alone. Does that make sense?


It does to me..........


"...Why is everyone a victim? Take personal responsibility for your life..."
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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 20 of 25

I enjoy being a loner for the most part but I don't want to grow old alone. Does that make sense?

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