💛 How Caregivers Can Manage a Care Recipient's Anger​ (AARP Article)

[Winter2025VA]

FROM THE ARTICLE.

Finding Calm in the Chaos: Navigating Care-Recipient Anger With Compassion.

Discover ways to manage and support your loved one during episodes of anger.

By Paul Wynn, AARP. Published June 26, 2025.

Laurel Wittman and Eddie Lopes met in 2001, five years after he was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis (MS) at 23 years old. At the time, Lopes was still mobile and working as a real estate developer for adult communities. But his physical decline was swift, leading him to rely on a wheelchair three years later; he became a quadriplegic within a decade. Despite health challenges, they were in love and tied the knot in 2005. Alongside the physical deterioration, however, Lopes developed significant cognitive and emotional issues, including profound anger and rage.

Wittman initially approached Lopes’ outbursts as though they were typical marital problems, attempting couples therapy and improved communication strategies. Unfortunately, these efforts proved futile due to the underlying neurological causes of his anger. “This was the beginning of an unpredictable time in our marriage that no conventional solution could easily solve,” says Wittman, copresident of the Well Spouse Association, which provides support for spousal caregivers. “His rage nearly destroyed our marriage and almost led to a divorce because his anger became harder to cope with than other aspects of his MS.” Lopes is now 51, and his anger has softened as his cognitive abilities have declined. “He has less energy to fight, so there’s a lot less conflict, and that’s made a positive difference in our relationship,” says Wittman.

USE LINK BELOW TO READ THE ARTICLE.

https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/home-care/manage-care-recipient-anger/