Help with debilitated wife staying home alone

[march948760]

Hi,

My wife recently had a stroke, and is very unstable on her feet. I take care of her and wouldn't have it any other way. However, when i leave the house, even for short periods of time, I get very nervous she'll fall and have no one to help her.

Does anyone recommend any emergency response buttons / systems. I saw a few recommended here https://www.seniorsafetyreviews.com/reviews/best-medical-alert-systems/ but wanted to know if any had any personal recommendations?

[LynneTK]

Oh, wow!  That's such a hard situation.  

When my mother began getting more unsteady, I started looking at home medical alerts for her.  She lives about an hour away and isn't interested in moving.

This is a good resource that lists options along with cost, pros/cons, etc.

https://www.medicalalertbuyersguide.org/best-medical-alert-systems/

I ended up choosing the Bay Alarm Medical system because it has the longest reach we could find.  It works 1,000 from the base station, even when she's outside.  Since she likes to work in the yard and take the dog out, this provides better coverage.

[JaneCares]

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@march948760 wrote:

Hi,

My wife recently had a stroke, and is very unstable on her feet. I take care of her and wouldn't have it any other way. However, when i leave the house, even for short periods of time, I get very nervous she'll fall and have no one to help her.

Does anyone recommend any emergency response buttons / systems. I saw a few recommended here https://www.seniorsafetyreviews.com/reviews/best-medical-alert-systems/ but wanted to know if any had any personal recommendations?

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hi there, march,

AARP has a good review as well, here: https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/home-care/info-2017/medic-alert-systems-options.html

You'll need to compare and see what you two really need. 

In the meantime, there are other steps you can take to prevent her from falling. Is she willing to use a cane or a walker, at least to help her get up from a chair? Oh and is she taking physical therapy, still? Perhaps a yoga or a tai chi class for older people would be possible: those are two practices that help with balance. But in your home, you probably already know the drill: here is a thorough checklist to print out and use in your home.

https://assets.aarp.org/external_sites/caregiving/checklists/checklist_preventFalls.html

Your love for her shines through. She is a lucky lady to have you there. I hope that, if her care begins to wear on you, that you will look into getting some help, either from other family members or by hiring someone to help with stuff you have trouble getting to now (cleaning the bathroom and shoveling snow comes to mind), or to be with her when you need to or want to be away for a break. It doesn't mean you are disloyal or uncaring. As the flight steward says, put the oxygen on you first.

please take care of yourself, and keep writing here. much wisdom on this site. 

Jane

[intersan]

It's a very difficult situation as my mother lived alone until she entered a nursing home at age 83. We had Lifeline for her, a new concept back in the 90's, but she never used it. I have a brother who is 68 and lives alone and is overweight and not in good health. I want him to get such a device. The problem is if your wife won't use it in an emergency. Make sure she carries her phone on her at all times. Try to convince her that having such a device will give both of you peace of mind. Perhaps a trusted neighbor can provide a house key in case she needs to call 911.