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Question please help!!!. I know it is really up to the person needing care from a home health care service in which she does now. She has a woman that comes out six day a week, two hours a day now after the other lady had to stop because she could not work on a Saturday. She has a woman now that started on the 16th of April and really work in cleaning and the work that she is suppose to do. She had her oldest daughter working that was hired from a service over a year and she, the daughter was told by her brotherโs wife that the patient said wasnโt doing anything except set and texting on the phone for an hour and thirty minutes but did give her mother a shower. Now her other two daughter went this past week and filed for a job and both had been accepted. One of her daughters was at her mothers home this morning and got a call and said she was hired and just three houres later her other daughter was hired and each one wants the job. What would anyone who reads this do if you had a choice to accept just one if the first one did not do her job? As I see it and heard that each one is telling hheir mom to tell the service that you want me to work and take care of you and the other says the same thing. If she tells one then the other will get mad and so will the other if her sister gets it. Should she keep the woman she has now or take one of her daughters and have one to get mad and never come back to see her at all and will think that the mother patient cares more for one and not the other? This is going to bee rough on her by having A-Fib and more at 67 years old. Any responces without questions?
I agree with Amy's advice. Hire a professional, and have family do stuff that families should do. I know it seems as though a home health aid should do more than sit and play with their phones, but part of their job is to be a presence just in case. It helps to be very specific about what you and your wife want the aide to do.
What else do you need here? If your daughters aren't getting along or are competitive with each other, perhaps you all could sit down with, say, your pastor, and try to work things out? Just a thought.
You have a lot on your plate. Please keep writing us. We learn from you as you learn from us.
Jane
@efbaker51 Oh my what a complicated situation! I'm surprised that a home health agency would hire family members just for the purpose of caring for your wife. Does your wife receive Medicaid? Perhaps that's the connection. At any rate, if you've got someone who is doing well and works out now - I hope that can continue and therefore not involve your daughters as they are hopefully providing support in other ways as caregiving is a family affair! All hands on deck and everyone is needed in some way!
Wishing you and your wife all the best - she's lucky to have an advocate in you!
@efbaker51 Hi! I want to help but need to clarify - is this a situation where biological children are being hired by an agency to care for their mother and their mother has to choose which child to hire?
Or is this a situation where the patiet feels pressured to hire the daughters of one of her former caregivers?
If the latter, I donโt think she should feel pressured to hire anyone who has already proven they wonโt do the job! Keep looking!
If the caregivers are related to the patient thats more complicated. Can you clarify?
Thank you!
Take care,
Amy Goyer, AARP Family & Caregiving Expert
Author, Juggling Life, Work and Caregiving and Color Your Way Content When Caring for Loved Ones
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