AGING ISSUES AND ASSISTANCE FOR SINGLE ELDERS

[pilgrim8]

As a single female (age 74) with no family, friends who live far away, others who are my age or older there seems to be little information anywhere to address those in my circumstances. Questions that arise: 1. Who to name as POA for healthcare and oversee daily needs if applicable? 2. Who to name as executor - not just the legal role but who will be "hands on" going through one's personal living space and possessions? 3. Who to name as POA for Finances? Ideally, there would be a place where all of the above could be established and coordinated. There are thousands of singles in my predicament (Facebook groups) who do not know what to do. I would very much appreciate a focus on this with specific information and resources. 

[GailL1]

@pilgrim8 wrote: 

Questions that arise: 1. Who to name as POA for healthcare and oversee daily needs if applicable? 2. Who to name as executor - not just the legal role but who will be "hands on" going through one's personal living space and possessions? 3. Who to name as POA for Finances?

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For Financial POA, you can see what the Social Security Administration does for 

somebody that gets a Social Security benefit but for whom it needs to be overseen.  You can apply the same concept to all of your financials, even management of other assets.

SSA.gov - Representative Payee 

The SSA uses social service agencies, state or local government agencies, financial institutions, and other community-based non-profit organizations that are licensed and bonded in their state; essentially, any organization capable of managing the beneficiary's funds responsibly.

Many of my friends use banks or other financial institutions as their POA.  They set it up with the institutions and they work off a fee schedule.  They can also act as executor when the subject dies.  

Another friend of mine used the same tax preparer/bookkeeper for years and years and she trusted this person very much so when she got to time when she could no longer handle her affairs due to cognitive decline, the tax preparer/bookkeper took over all of the duties.  When her POA duties died with the person, this same tax preparer/bookkeeper became her Executor of her Will. 

An institution woul follow the lead of the Will or Trust and if possessions are to be distributed or sold, they handle it either directly or by hiring someone to handle the sale or distribution of the possessions.

Healthcare is handled by a directive from you - States call it different things - Healthcare Directive / Healthcare POA / Living Will - in essence, you determine how your care will be handled when inflicted by a devastating illness or accident.  

IOW, do you want to be saved by resuscitation, do you want to be saved by any and all lifesaving measures and specifically do you want tube feeding to keep you alive,   Do you want intubation and oxygen by artificial means to keep you alive.  

You make these decision when you can and then assign a Healthcare POA to carry out these wishes.  You can also have a backup one in case the 1st cannot make the decision or isn’t in a place to make it.

Even if you give have these things all worked out and a healthcare POA assisgned, you need to keep you primary doctor informed as to your wishes,

Personally, I think it is better sometimes to have these duties performed by a close friend or family if you trust them but that isn’t always necessary or warranted.  In fact, it might be that one outside of a close friend or family might be a better pick since the emotions seens to be taken out of the decision making.

An elder law attorney or a family law attorney may be a good placed to start your design and legal documents.  

[pilgrim8]

Thanks for the tips -  much appreciated! The most tricky one is the Healthcare POA. I know I can set up my preferences, but I do need someone to make sure they are carried out. When my mom was in assisted living, many things they do not do - take care of medical appointments/scheduling, staying on top of prescriptions, small sundry purchases, etc. Will keep exploring that one!

[GailL1]

Sounds like for Medical you are looking for a real hands-on single person.  I have a friend that I have appointed as my health care POA but their job is to make sure that my wishes are carried out in the Healthcare directive. 

Sounds like you are looking for a Health Advocate

or perhaps a health aide that has spent some time with you and knows your needs and preferences.  This would take time to build such a relationship.  

My aunt had a health aide for many years.  They developed into more than just a patent/caregiver relationship.  She performed these duties and even took my aunt to appointments - 

The lady that did the taxes for another elder that I talked about in my other reply actually did all this for the person.  She arranged for all her care also.  

But these were for people that didn’t go into an Assisted Living facility.