if you are caring for a loved one and you feel you are the most well versed on their wishes, likes, dislikes and maybe promises made to them, then my number one piece of advice is to do what you know they wanted. Do right by them by honorong their wishes. Enrich their days by giving them what they like. Don't let family opinions of balanced diets, sweets vs proteins, calories and too much full strength coca cola cloud your decisions. I brought my mom into my home two months before she died. I couldn't stand watching her veg in that awful nursing home where they'd feed her pureed meatloaf. Even the sherbert was some cheap off brand that lacked flavor. To make matters worse their assessment of her was that she was doing well - wow, slumped over in a wheelchair is doing well? Shocking. Once home with me she was surrounded by things she was familiar with, we played all the oldies on the CD player, she drank coca cola one after the other, i made her Campbell's tomato soup using half-n-half, and yes, sometimes she had root beer floats for breakfast. I am at peace and i know my mom is too.


God has blessed both you and your mom in her final two months.  As one taking care of my father (4 strokes, 3 heart attacks and worsening dementia) in my home for2-3/4 years and mom the same time in a nursing home, I lost my husband to a rare cancer this year.  He was such a helpmate and support for me, and he had so much more stamina than I.  My faith continues to sustain me and it seems you and your mom made the best of her last few months on earth.  I believe you will see her again in Heaven and rejoice at your deicision.   May God Bless and Comfort You.

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