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Senior Citizen stories, Senior jokes and cartoons.

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Senior Citizen stories, Senior jokes and cartoons.

Hope this topic gives us another winner. Senior stories, jokes or cartoons to enjoy and have fun laughing at ourselves. 

 

BEST EVER SENIOR CITIZEN JOKE.....

A little silver-haired lady calls her neighbor and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started."
Her neighbor asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"
The little silver haired lady says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."
Her neighbor decides to go over and help with the puzzle.
She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster." He takes her hand and says, "Secondly, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea" and then he said with a deep sigh ............

"Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."

 

 

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Trusted Contributor

What do you call someone who can't stick a diet

 

A Desserter

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Bronze Conversationalist

I remember 78 RPM records, Burma Shave signs and " Only The Shadow Knows,'", on the radio. The kind of radio that set on a table in the front room and had knobs on it. I remember my Dad had a Buick with a Straight Eight engine. Now if I could just remember what  I went to the Kitchen for? 

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Thanksgiving has inspired some of the funniest Thanksgiving jokes, quotes and sayings. So, sit back and get ready for some of the funniest jokes around.

  • How did Albert Einstein celebrate Thanksgiving? He was very thinkful.
  • What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children? If your father could see you now, heโ€™d turn over in his gravy!
  • How many cooks does it take to stuff a turkey? One, but you really have to squeeze him in!
  • Why canโ€™t you take a turkey to church? Because they use such FOWL language.
  • What happened when the turkey got into a fight? He got the stuffing knocked out of him.
  • Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building? Yes โ€“ a building canโ€™t jump at all.
  • If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims!
  • What would you get if you crossed a turkey with an evil spirit? A poultrygeist!
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