Start Here or Call 844-222-0104 to Urge Your Senator to Say No to the Graham-Cassidy Health Care Bill

Reply
Valued Social Butterfly
Posts: 3,584
Registered: ‎01-24-2008

Re: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

Message 51 of 2,578 (408 Views)

Those two are a fastidious couple...She's fast and he's hideous.

 

 

 

 

 

Henny Youngman

Valued Social Butterfly
Posts: 3,584
Registered: ‎01-24-2008

Re: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

Message 52 of 2,578 (448 Views)

No matter the price

No matter how new

The best safety device

In the car is you.

 

 

Burma Shave

Valued Social Butterfly
Posts: 3,584
Registered: ‎01-24-2008

Re: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

Message 53 of 2,578 (476 Views)

When I read about the evils of drinking... I gave up reading.

 

 

 

 

Henny Youngman

Valued Social Butterfly
Posts: 3,584
Registered: ‎01-24-2008

Re: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

Message 54 of 2,578 (503 Views)

GO GREEN...............  RECYCLE CONGRESS !

Valued Social Butterfly
Posts: 3,584
Registered: ‎01-24-2008

Re: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

Message 55 of 2,578 (490 Views)

OBAM-A -LAMA - DING DONG...

Valued Social Butterfly
Posts: 3,584
Registered: ‎01-24-2008

Re: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

Message 56 of 2,578 (501 Views)

There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night !   Finally, I let her out.

 

My other brother-in-law died. He was a Karate expert, then he joined the Army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself.

Valued Social Butterfly
Posts: 3,584
Registered: ‎01-24-2008

Re: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

[ Edited ]
Message 57 of 2,578 (528 Views)

You only take a bath when it rains....

 

Anytime your kids see a dog, they get out their ropes and lasso it and tackle it to the ground.

 

Your gun cabinet takes up half of your living room.

 

You save old kitchen appliances for children's Christmas presents.

 

Your master bathroom has the words "Porta" and "potty" written on the side.

Valued Social Butterfly
Posts: 3,584
Registered: ‎01-24-2008

Re: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

[ Edited ]
Message 58 of 2,578 (521 Views)

Actual GED test questions and results administered to 16 yr.olds:

 

Q.    What is a terminal illness?

A.    When you are sick at the airport.

 

Q.      What does the word "benign ' mean?

A.       Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

Valued Social Butterfly
Posts: 3,584
Registered: ‎01-24-2008

Re: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

Message 59 of 2,578 (499 Views)

SWIFT truck that's slow, equals........

 

OXY**bleep**

Highlighted
Valued Social Butterfly
Posts: 3,584
Registered: ‎01-24-2008

Re: SHARE A JOKE EVERY DAY

Message 60 of 2,578 (506 Views)

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

 

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

 

How do you know when you run out of invisible ink?