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Frequent Social Butterfly
Posts: 226
Registered: ‎05-04-2011

Re: Grief means love

Message 1 of 2 (430 Views)

ae9301 wrote:

Hello Group,

 

I lost my husband May 30th. It's been just past 60 days, I was a newlywed of only six months. I asked myself when would I overcome this pain, and hurt. I have cried every day for the last 60 days, my poor eyes became infected, and I had to go to the ER for treatment. When the nurse asked me why had I cried so much every day, I told her about my husband died suddenly. The nurse said to me, "I know you loved your husband dearly, and you will grieve more, grieving means love, because had you not loved your husband, you would not grieve."  I knew in my heart, I had never loved anyone the way I loved my husband.My late husband used to tell me,  that I loved hard straight from my soul. I came home from the ER and sit down, and realized all the pain I feel is because of my love for him.

 

Imagine the emotional and physical pain Jesus felt when he sacrificed his life for us.   

 

Blessings!

 

 

 

 


Oh dear one,

 

I am so sorry. Your love for your husband has carved a huge hole in your heart where he used to reside, and now you ache. The nurse who treated you in the ER was so kind and so very right. What a great love you had with him. "Died suddenly" is such a horror!  So abrupt, so terrifying.

         Have you read the book "The Year of Magical Thinking" by the amazing writer Joan Didion? She really nails the feeling of grief that is palpable, like wearing a heavy itchy wool cloak all the time regardless of weather. I don't know if you want to read something about grief while you are grieving, but i can imagine that one effect is that you feel just a wee bit less alone.

         I do hope that you have loving people around you, in family or friends or in  a faith community or all of the above. You may not feel like you are any 'fun' but for people who love you, just being with you is a treat for them, and you can just sit and be present. I hope that is true for you.

         What did you and your husband love to do together?  Would you like to write about the day he died?  Sometimes getting the story of the death 'on paper' is catharctic, and it saves the event as one of your stories, like a journal. Write it, post it, then print it out. Someone else may find it one day.

         Thank you for writing. I am so sorry. I am here as are others and we may not post everyday but your posts get read and we do reply.

         With respect and kindness,

                  Jane

Info Seeker
Posts: 4
Registered: ‎08-08-2015

Grief means love

Message 2 of 2 (457 Views)

Hello Group,

 

I lost my husband May 30th. It's been just past 60 days, I was a newlywed of only six months. I asked myself when would I overcome this pain, and hurt. I have cried every day for the last 60 days, my poor eyes became infected, and I had to go to the ER for treatment. When the nurse asked me why had I cried so much every day, I told her about my husband died suddenly. The nurse said to me, "I know you loved your husband dearly, and you will grieve more, grieving means love, because had you not loved your husband, you would not grieve."  I knew in my heart, I had never loved anyone the way I loved my husband.My late husband used to tell me,  that I loved hard straight from my soul. I came home from the ER and sit down, and realized all the pain I feel is because of my love for him.

 

Imagine the emotional and physical pain Jesus felt when he sacrificed his life for us.   

 

Blessings!

 

 

 

 

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