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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 1 of 23

I would love to be doing so!  After myr Dad passed away I stayed at his house for a little while trying to tie up the loose ends, I found it to be heaven!  All good things must come to an end they say and they did when I came back to my home.  I dream of how it was when I first moved in here so long ago, the freedom to live as I pleased without answering any questions or having to clean after anyone..

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Treasured Social Butterfly

Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 2 of 23

@saucykicker 

 

Yep: DH is Dear Hubby. Sorry to confuse.

 

Yes, I can be both introvert and extrovert, though walking the path of an extrovert is, for me, draining, and I can only do it so long before I need to rest in solitude. 

 

As far as Myers Briggs, I'm one of those weirdo Protector/Healer hybrids. ISFJ and INFP. I've taken the test many times and always come out that way. Obviously somebody dropped me on my head as an infant. Smiley Happy Solitude saves me from myself, as I am something of an empath. A shopping trip during the recession was exhausting for me, not because of the shopping but because of the emotionally heavy air. 

 

For decades, I've had that Goethe quote (well, the last portion of it) framed and hanging on my office wall, btw. Smiley Happy

 

 

 

"The key to success is to keep growing in all areas of life - mental, emotional, spiritual, as well as physical." Julius Erving
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Bronze Conversationalist

Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 3 of 23

FIRST: For the record, what is DH? Is that a person? An acronym for Dear Husband? A person on the AARP Community Boards? Thanks in Advance—Inquiring Minds like to know!

 

On introverts: I am definitely one. I spend lots of time alone. Life experiences have taught me I need people tho. I am still trying to integrate that.

 

Have any of you come across the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI)? I happened upon it in high school and it has made all the difference for me!

 

I use it a lot to understand the “group situations” I find myself in. I also use it to help me stay the course in the face of the high energy of an Extrovert. And sometimes, I can use it to get out of my normal routines, my little box of life, and try different ways of experiencing daily existence.

 

With a preference for Thinking vs Feeling, as described by the MBTI, LOGIC frequently rules my roost. When I use my understanding of Thinking vs Feeling, sometimes, I can move a tick off LOGIC into my HEART, and all manner of things move in my life, in a way I could not have predicted nor imagined. (Think Goethe quote! posted below)

 

I like being an Introvert, I think. I’ve heard that as Introverts we have CHOICE. We can both introvert and extrovert, with relative ease.

 

Think about it! An extrovert who can choose to remain quiet, has really done a LOT of work on themselves.Smiley Tongue

 

While I do need time to recharge after “encounters,” I am also able to be out and about, as long as the object of attention is not my personal self, but some topic, book, activity or some other place than “me” where I meetup with the other person. (Hoping that makes sense.)

 

Goethe on CommittmentGoethe on Committment

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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 4 of 23

DH sent this to me. Thought some here might enjoy it. Smiley Happy

 

Because, seriously, you're not going anywhere anyway.Because, seriously, you're not going anywhere anyway.

"The key to success is to keep growing in all areas of life - mental, emotional, spiritual, as well as physical." Julius Erving
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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 5 of 23

Agree with all 10. How about the rest of you? Have you found these things to be true?

 

top ten benefits from spending time alone.jpg

 

 

 

 

"The key to success is to keep growing in all areas of life - mental, emotional, spiritual, as well as physical." Julius Erving
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Treasured Social Butterfly

Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 6 of 23

retiredtraveler wrote:

"....Still, many other modern-day hermits actually live in their parents’ basements or analogous internet-connected pits and have meals slipped through a crack in the door while they chat online with their hermit friends....".

 

Hmmmm........


Smiley Happy I don't think that really meets the criteria of being a real hermit!


Registered on Online Community since 2007!
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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 7 of 23

"....Still, many other modern-day hermits actually live in their parents’ basements or analogous internet-connected pits and have meals slipped through a crack in the door while they chat online with their hermit friends....".

 

Hmmmm........


Just think. The world was built by the lowest bidder.
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Treasured Social Butterfly

Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 8 of 23

There's a love of seclusion and then there's this fellow: http://www.outsideonline.com/2159661/wild-facts-about-americas-most-famous-hermit

 

The Secret Life of America's Last True Hermit
A new book reveals, in vivid detail, how Christopher Knight escaped society more completely than most anybody else in human history

 

Pull quote:

 

"He Was Just 20 When He Began His Seclusion
When Knight walked into the woods in 1986, he had never been on a date or even spent a night in a tent. One day, he drove his Subaru as far as roads would take him into the Maine woods, less than an hour from where he grew up. He left the keys on the dashboard and started walking south. There weren’t many indicators that Knight wanted to abandon human contact so completely—he was following some sort of inner directive that worked on a level removed from logic. He told Finkel, “I had no plans when I left, I wasn’t thinking of anything. I just did it.” Knight had a fairly normal childhood in an unusually resourceful, slightly reclusive New England family. At the time, he was working installing alarm systems and had just bought the new car. No one expected it, not his school friends or even his brother, who had helped fund the Subaru and would be saddled with the debt for it. One day, Knight simply decided that he would live a life of his own design."

 

 

"The key to success is to keep growing in all areas of life - mental, emotional, spiritual, as well as physical." Julius Erving
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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 9 of 23

Sometimes being a loner can give me peace from daily distractions, yet I'm not into yoga or meditation per se.  Being alone if forced upon you by death or divorce leads to seeking out others of similar circumstances, because it's human nature.  What motivates me to get out and socialize is boredom from a routine.  I'm finding a renewed interest in things I compromised on with my spouse because he didn't share the things I loved to do.  

 

I'm not a party animal either--but if some of you are, a new senior community proposed by Jimmy Buffett called Margheritaville is being built.  Probably a island  setting with Palm trees, tequila, etc --It's 5:00 somewhere.

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Re: Anyone Else Enjoy Being A Loner?

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Message 10 of 23


  One of the big things that the 55  communities push is socialization..  I left thinking that I did not really want to be part of a group that got together every day.  I would not mind once in a while but I wondered how accepting people would be of that kind of attitude where you did not want to be part of the group every day.  

@nyadrn

 

Ewwwww! Eve-r-y Day? No can do. We plan to move into one of these retirement communities shortly before we become too feeble to drive a car. I don't know: maybe we'll be up for everyday contact by then. Maybe we'll lead the daily walk or something then retreat to our apartment. Or maybe we'll resort to starting food fights in the dining hall so they make us eat alone, too ... jk. 

 

I am of the opinion that their attitude about our lifestyle doesn't matter. As paying residents we'd be the boss, not the front office or the activity chair. 

 

"The key to success is to keep growing in all areas of life - mental, emotional, spiritual, as well as physical." Julius Erving
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