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Conversationalist
Posts: 10
Registered: ‎07-21-2009

Re: Grit!

Message 11 of 15 (5,123 Views)

Absolutely agree, anyone is allowed to quit sometimes.  And agreed that that psychiatrist probably should have!

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Posts: 19,379
Registered: ‎12-25-2011

Re: Grit!

Message 12 of 15 (2,586 Views)

LaDolceVita wrote:

Sounds like this doctor had some issues to work through before working with patients.  I cannot imagine anyone wanting to be a patient of his after the first visit!!


Maybe he said things deliberately to see how I'd react, and lash out at him. I looked at having to see him, to get approval as an MD for insurance purposes, as a "necessary evil", so I just kept my mouth shut & waited for him to sign the form! Smiley Happy


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Posts: 1,956
Registered: ‎02-01-2008

Re: Grit!

Message 13 of 15 (2,509 Views)

Sounds like this doctor had some issues to work through before working with patients.  I cannot imagine anyone wanting to be a patient of his after the first visit!!

vita umbratilis
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Posts: 19,379
Registered: ‎12-25-2011

Re: Grit!

Message 14 of 15 (2,437 Views)

I took the "Grit Quiz" from your link & scored high, but find that some of the questions/measurements misleading.

 

Years ago, I had to see a psychiatrist to get approval for routine therapy to be covered under insurance. He had a brash attitude, and I would never have gone to him on an ongoing basis. He asked me for a personal history (25 years in 5 minutes?!), and fixated on my saying that after studying engineering, I applied to only 3 of the best law schools, didn't get accepted, and forgot about going into patent law. He labeled me a "quitter", and talked about his own struggle to get into the psychiatric program he wanted in medical school, and how he reapplied multiple times, before he was accepted. Judging by his manner towards me, I was very tempted to say maybe HE should have looked for another field .. but that sure wouldn't have gotten me his signature I needed! He totally ignored that I grew up w/o a father, went to one of the most prestigious & difficult to get into engineering schools, was one of only 2 women to graduate that year, had a successful career, and was active in my town.

 

There is nothing wrong with "quitting" something, if it no longer makes you happy, or you decide on a better course of action. There's nothing magical about completing every task, if you decide it's "not for you". The only thing to be examined is if someone quits the majority of things they start, and/or doesn't complete things they do find rewarding.

 


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Registered: ‎07-21-2009

Grit!

Message 15 of 15 (2,406 Views)

No, not the magazine.  Smiley Wink  (A reference that the whippersnappers probably wouldn't get.)  The grit that Angela Duckworth studies and writes about in her book Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance.

 

I'd be embarrassed to say how I did on the little "grit scale" Duckworth includes in her book and website.  But, Duckworth might say, the whole point of her book and her work is that grit can be learned, taught, and developed.

 

But at my age--66?  I don't know.  I got the book after reading a review, hoping to find inspiration and practical advice in improving a dimension I know I'm weak in.  And there is plenty of good information, practical as well as inherently interesting.  But I'm ending up just feeling depressed and discouraged.  All the inspiring stories of young people who had or developed grit and went on to have great lives and brilliant careers--wonderful.  But my career is much nearer its end than its beginning.  And far more painful even than that is the knowledge of how important it was to consciously help my children develop these qualities of passion and perseverance--and the knowledge that I didn't.  Not systematically anyway.  And it's far too late to undo my failure in that area--the youngest is three years into college already.

 

What do you think?  Is "grit" as important as Angela Duckworth thinks it is (and as I think it is, for the record)?  Can it be developed, and is it even worth developing, in late codgerhood?  Is there any way of making up for so much lost time and opportunity?